shoot the fair one.

I hate to do this to you guys. I mean I had you all convinced that gym guy was a scumbag and all. But, I talked to him at the gym today, and I like him again. He was being all normal and talking about his life growing up in Brooklyn. We had a fairly lengthy conversation, and he told me about his family and his ex-girlfriend who lives in Staten Island and tons more goodies like that. He was being real and normal. I get the sense that he acts like all flirtacious online, because he's not like that in person. None of our "in person" conversations have ever been trashy. Only the online one we had the other day. So, I've decided to just chill and see what happens. It may be an elaborate scheme to get in my pants, because we all know how guys can be. (That includes gay guys) But, it may not be. We'll see.

Your ego's writing checks your body can't cash

Today, I did what I could to avoid gym guy. But, its like he was waiting for me. Normally he sits in his office, and its easy to walk by without him seeing me. Today he was "under the weather" and was sitting in the lobby. As soon as he saw me he beckoned me. He was just giving me small talk because some other guy was there talking to us. Then I scampered away as soon as possible. "Come talk to me when your done" he said. Unfortunately, he saw me as I was leaving and I stopped to talk to him. We couldn't really talk because another person was there. He told me he had the "information" for me. Then told the other person it was a "private thing". I feel like I'm in high school. He talks to me in front of everyone, which baffles me. I would think that he would want to shuffle me under the rug so he can run game on other girls. Whatever. I'm still riding this line between intrigued and disgusted. Though, I'm leaning more toward disgusted.

Anyway, I'm going to the Museum of Sex this weekend. I've also decided to do some volunteer work. I volunteered with an organization called New York Cares and I will either help with some meal delivery stuff or maybe even do some library sorting. Also, I lost a size! or maybe two, hard to tell. I'm back to my "default" size. My goal is a size 6. So, I have bit more to go. I'm at the gym every day. I only take Wednesdays off to watch Lost. Which is kind of sucking this season.

Gym Guy

Okay so after two hours of messaging gym guy on myspace. he just wants to fuck me. In two hours, all the information he gave me about himself is that he is somewhat left handed and studied art. And that is the extent of what I learned. more importantly, he didn't bother to ask me any questions except for whether I have any interests that involve whip cream. When I asked him about how many gym girls he's been with, he answered with a very coy answer that managed to give no information. And yes, everyone has been like "I told you so" and "Watch out for V.D."

Of course my girlfriends are telling me not to do it, and my gay friends are telling me to do it. Sluts. One of my girlfriends, Carissa, made a very good point, she said, "He's going to do it with you and never talk to you again, and won't care about your pleasure at all. He's going to use you to get off and that's it." She's right. I've never ever had a one night stand. I think he totally wants to do it tomorrow too. He was like, "we can talk tomorrow about more interesting ways of doing cardio, will you be at the gym tomorrow?" I have to admit, I'm kind of bummed. Yes, I was sexually attracted to him, but this scumbag approach is a real turn-off. In fact, I've never had anyone ever approach me like this. In fact, I don't look easy and many have told me that I don't look like I'm easily approachable, especially in terms of trying to get sex from me.

But, he's super hot, and probably thought my "rules" didn't apply to him. And that accent...who can resist. Well I think I can. How disappointing. I didn't necessarily want to have his babies, but I didn't expect this direct, cold approach. I mean shit man, can't you pretend to be interested? And yes Shawn, I think I would have preferred that he feigned interest, he might have gotten farther from me. He's like a cat pouncing on me.

Mundane Life

New York is awesome, but of course the daily life can sometimes be a pain in the ass. My 30 minute express train is the slowest train and my commute to work can end up being 45-60 minutes, and there is nothing I can do about it. I'm a slave to MTA. It's awesome though, because on Friday it seemed as if every stop had musical entertainment. Bagpipish sounds from 59th street, Calypso sounding music from Pacific Street, and a folk singer at Union. The saga with gym guy has moved into the realm of myspace. We message, but its still the early stages of not really knowing what to say, but still trying to flirt. I ran into him today, he is a gorgeous man...and as my friend pointed out, most likely a heartbreaker. It seems I have his interest for now...we'll see how long that lasts.

Shameless Flirting

ya okay, forget the BFF shit. I ran into gym guy today and said, "oh, sorry I didn't give you my myspace info" and he said, "that's okay, you don't like me..." and I said, "I'll give it to you" and he said, "okay, but don't be like those other girls, post comments and message me" and I said, "well, okay, but do I have free reign to say what i want, because i want to lick your bicep" "what are you doing later?" he asked. what the hell? I sincerely thought I wanted to be friends, but before I realized, the words were already out of my mouth. So, now we are in total flirting mode, and he probably thinks I want to do him. Which I do, but not that I would. I'm going to ride this out. We had another party at work today, I've been there about 4 weeks and we have had 3 parties when alcohol was served during business hours. It's nice.

BFF?

Interesting factoid. The floor of my building that we moved into was previously inhabited by the UN. Upon moving into the floor, military police were carting large safes and metal filing cabinets out. It turns out that the mysterious contents of the filing cabinets were official and original documents from the Nuremberg Trials. How cool is that!? Our floor housed a very ugly and important part of history. So cool. So, I've decided to chill on my obsession of gym guy. He asked for my myspace info, we had a very casual conversation over quadricep extensions. I decided that what I need is a friend in Brooklyn rather than a quick romance or awkward situation. I'm going to wrangle this guy in as my new BFF. That's the plan. He seems really nice, but I have a very bad judge of character. Work is getting better, still rough. I have a fantastic manager. Its like she knows exactly what I'm going through. Which is a lot.

Secret Obsession

My friend's sister was in town, so we went to a club in the East Village. We were all in the mood to dance to hip hop. But, it was salsa night. To top it off, they didn't carry Guinness. It was a pretty uneventful evening, although we didn't get home until 4:15 a.m. My slight interest in the gym guy has turned into a full blown obsession. I feel like I'm in high school again. I want to know everything about him, but I don't want to mistake our small interactions as anything more than friendly conversations. You can get away with a lot of things in the gym atmosphere, where commenting on each other's bodies is completely normal. He told me I "look good" and I told him that he has a "nice physique". If this conversation had happened in a bar, we would be waking up together with a hangover. But, it happened at the gym, so its hard to make anything from this. I don't want to ask him out, because I asked out a guy about 4 months ago, who had seemed interested, and he kind of gave me this dumbfounded look. I found out later he had a girlfriend. The gym guy told me he has an ex-girlfriend, so that may not be a problem here, but he may not be interested in that way. How many girls does he talk to in a day? I hate this. I'm probably just going to obsess in silence.

I'm in love...

with some guy that came to my door looking for a room in the hostel I call home. His name is Mossimo, and he greeted me with a "Ciao". Beautiful man. Straight from Italy. Anyhow, I'm on this road to crazy weightloss, hitting the gym every night (to see the hot guy who works there), in order to increase my chances of reproduction. I feel this enormous pressure to be thin and lose weight. Lucky for me, I don't have much going on, and the gym is literally a 4 minute walk from my house. I was trying to talk my friend into moving to New York. There's so much about this city that can't even be articulated. I love the view of the city from the window of the N train as we are going over the Manhattan bridge. I love that I watched some guy walk right in front of an oncoming vehicle (on a green light), and had the nerve to flip off the driver. I love that if I feel like taking Bharata Natyam lessons I can.

Dum Spiro Spero

I cried today when walking home from the subway. Cried because I'm ashamed of myself for not being over my ex. Ashamed for not learning my lesson about boys who hurt me. (emotionally, not physically)I found myself wishing for a tumultous relationship. The kind with intense love and intense hate. Just so I can feel something other than this. And what is this? I don't know. I've never been the type that always needs a guy, but I guess I'm just overwhelmed with all this new stuff in my life. I wish I could be one of those girls who knew how to say goodbye to someone who didn't treat me right. And another part of me is ashamed that I even worry about something so trivial when other people have real problems. There is so much to be thankful for, and yet, I'm sitting here being lame. Right now all I can do is breath and hope.

Blue Collar Lust

I have a history of dating men below my potential. Like the time I dated the guy who told me that going to college was stupid. Or the guy I dated that didn't finish high school and decided not to get a GED. Having a Master's degree for some reason dictates that I cannot date someone who doesn't have a similiar educational background. When I moved to the city, everyone told me that I would find men in my field that would be perfect for me. I would finally date a professional. I'm not attracted to the men in the city. They are so petite and too well-dressed. Too metro. So, I find myself checking out the guy at McDonald's, the guy delivering vegetables, and the meaty guy working at the gym with the Brooklyn accent who told me he grew up with Guidos. I'm pretty sure I want that guy to fuck me until I'm choking on my orgasms. Yes, plural. Orgasms. What's going on here. I'm destined to find a blue collar love. Or lust.

Conversation over Tortilla Soup

Yesterday, a work friend and I went to lunch and she mentioned that she had mini-panic attacks while she was sleeping. I asked her what she thought was causing them, and she revealed that she and her husband were having problems. They've been married for 5 years, he's always away and she doesn't care anymore. She said she woke up and said, "Oh fuck, this is real", meaning that she knows that if her marriage fails, she faces getting a divorce. She also said that he wouldn't give up his career or change the course of his career to be home more often. She's known this man in her words, "forever". I shouldn't base my opinions on her unique situation, but man, I'm totally thinking that love is some type of fantasia. Especially in New York, people here seem happily single and thankfully child-free. This is a city of adults it seems. Nobody looks at each other on the subway, but when there are kids around, everyone eyes them curiously or perhaps, suspiciously. I hate to be so cynical, but I'm not sure I believe in love. Maybe I'll meet some couple who is wonderfully in love, and they can prove me wrong. I hope. I don't like being the love grinch.

P.S. I saw the departed last night. Loved it. Leonardo Dicaprio was beautful and absolutely brilliant. And the soundtrack! I've always liked the Dropkick Murphys.

To all the men I've burned...

If you haven't heard Buffalo got super snow. I'm glad I missed it!

So, as I was riding the train to work today, I started thinking about the men I've burned in my life. I've been burned way more than I've burned. I thought about the guy with the mohawk who brought me a keychain which said my name meant goddess. He followed this up by saying, "this is what you are to me, a goddess". So sweet. It wouldn't have worked, he was short and his hair so spiky and stiff. Last I saw him, he was a tattoo artist.

Then, there was the guy we all thought was gay, so I was dared to ask him out (b/c no gay guy can resist me!). Turns out he was straight and Jewish to boot. For our first date, we saw Leaving Las Vegas. Don't ever see that movie on date night, it will make you want to commit suicide. Long story short, I totally dumped him as a prom date (I later got dumped, so he got his satisfaction) and completely stopped talking to him.

Most recently, was the guy I dumped twice. This one doesn't bother me as much because this guy was a scum bag. We dated for awhile and I needed to breathe. A year and a half later, I dated him again, this time he had a kid and a baby mama to go with it. I was over it.

Pretty short list. I can fill up all these pages with the times I've been burned. My favorite burn is the time I was hanging out with a foot fetishist and he was doing two girls and rubbing my feet on the side. That was fun.
Random Picture from the Window of my Work

I'm an airhead.

I started this blog as a sort of record of my time spent in New York, but also as my new found status as an employee. I have a job that I really want. Grad school prepared me for the work that I do, but there is a learning curve to every job. Well, I'm starting to kind of freak out, because I think my managers and co-workers think I'm stupid. They think this, because everytime they tell me something, I forget what they said. So, I have taken to writing things down so I can remember. I'm just really bummed that I may not get better at this. I hope I'm wrong. I hope that I will look at this post in 2 months and laugh. Its really depressing right now.

This is totally off topic, but I think I just saw Kevin Federline on CSI: Las Vegas

My Awesome Purse

This weekend I went shopping at this place called Century 21, a staple of New York. It's where you go when you can't really afford full price Marc Jacobs or Roberto Cavalli. So, I paid way too much for this bag, but its worth it. I hope. Its BCBG MaxAzria. Working in Manhattan kind of pulls you into the fashion vortex.

The Hotel de Brooklyn

When moving to New York, I had my heart set on Brooklyn. I found an awesome room on Craigslist for pretty cheap. Beautiful Neighborhood (see pics below). My landlord is Russian and as she was showing me the place, it was immaculate. She told me that I live with 3 other people. Cool, I'll take it, I said. So, here I am. I haven't really seen or heard any of my roommates. I bumped into one upstairs who was really friendly. While we were talking, she told me that there were actually 8 people living in the house (thick russian accent?). Of course, I was appalled. I went from "having roommates" to living in a hostel. Lucky for me, they don't cook its like living with ghosts. I've only seen 2 of them. On top of that, I only get two tv channels, and one of them is TNT. My landlord is also one of the unfriendliest people I have ever met. When my roommate had a friend stay for 6 days, she charged him $300. But, people are allowed to stay for a few days (for free) if its not for too long.

Brooklyn

My New Neighborhood
My Block in Brooklyn
I've been staying late at the office finishing up stuff. I had to rush home to move my car because in New York (in Buffalo too, but not as bad), there is alternate street parking. Unfortunately, everyone in Brooklyn has a car and everyone needs to move it to the same side of the street. So, at night the streets are packed with cars. I'm not even sure why I have a car anymore. I won't drive in fear of losing my parking spot. Even when its more convenient to drive than take the subway. Recent conversation:

Me: hey, i have to go to Target this weekend and pick up some stuff.
Friend: me too, we can get some stuff.
Me: ya, i'm going to take the subway.
Friend: why, its only a 20 minute drive, and you have a lot of stuff to pick up.
Me: no, not doing it. I have a good parking spot.
Friend: that's ridiculous.
Me: no way, I'm not giving up my spot.

Losties Unite!

Today was the longest day ever. The work-life balance that was promised me from my employer seems more like bullshit or hopeful thinking. I've only been working for 1.5 weeks and already I've taken work home and stayed late. I had to stay until 8:30 pm today which would have been awful, except for the fact that the Lost season premiere was today! I joined the Meetup Lost group and met random Losties at an Irish pub (Guinness!) to drool over Sawyer. The group was cool, no weird people or anything, just genuine Lost fans. I'm also interested in this American Express Lost promotion. The previews for next week seemed to imply a kiss between Sawyer and Kate. I guess I'll have to wait until then.

p.s. I will be putting pictures here very soon, this weekend.

Welcome to My New Life!

Hello All,
Today is the day that you can begin to peek into the life of a Neo-Brooklynite. I recently moved to New York City from California via Buffalo. As the Blog name suggests, I am a single working female professional. I decided to keep a journalish account of the many wonderful and normal things that occur here, which may probably seem absurd if you are not from here. I will also use this place as my personal dumping ground of thoughts and feelings that may not be related to the city. And, I may just blog about whatever I want and you will like it.